I Asked For It

Alcohol Meat Fish Eggs Eggplant Tomatoes Raw mangoes Raw mango pickle Bananas Guavas Chickoos Custard Apples Jackfruit Any fruit with milk Sour yoghurt Raw onion Raw onion in sour yoghurt Peas Corn Gram or gram flour Cauliflower Cabbage Capsicum Shrikhand (a dessert made from flavoured, fermented yoghurt) Anything with sugar syrup (including jalebis and gulab jamuns) Fried stuff like papads or pakoras Too much salt Ice-cream at night

These are the things my doctor has advised me to not eat, as long as I’m on medication for certain health problems. This might take about a year.

Serves me right, I guess. For cocking a snook at people who follow rigorous diets, for laughing my ass off at those who closely watch the weighing scales, for eating anything and everything worth eating, enjoying every morsel, gloating over every bite and writing about it all. Bloody karma.

May God give me the strength to eat what little isn’t on that list. Amen.